Domestic Animal jokes

Meow meow meow meow :p

Why do I call my dog a vibrator?

Because every time my dog acts like a dildo, I beat him, and when I beat him, he shakes. What do you call a shaking dildo? A vibrator, therefore I call my dog a vibrator.

Why did the goat have an abortion?

Because she already had too many kids!

What does a human and a cat have in common? Both take my bed.

One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."

The other said, "Really? I like my bed."

If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?