Distrust jokes

Why don’t scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t feel like screaming.

"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

My wife accused me of cheating. I told her she started to sound like my wife.

My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.

Question: Why can't you trust a tree?

Answer: 'Cause they are always shady.

I don't trust atoms.

They make up everything.