Criminal Law jokes

Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"

Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."

Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."

Guy: "About that..."

I hate these double standards.

If you burn a body at a crematorium you're "doing a good job". If you do it at home you're "destroying evidence".

The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"

I said, "Sexy."

If you push someone that's bullying, if you kill someone that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing.

What did the rapist say to his victim?

"Go ahead, call the police. We will see who comes first."