Carrier jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a carrier bag? One is plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is a carrier bag.

What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.

Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.

To become a licensed airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, but bigger ones need a crane.

I don't need to go to the car dealership when I have a Geico scanner on my arm at all times. 😏

Welcome onboard Sexist Airlines. Everyone, please fasten your seatbelts now as we are switching to a female pilot.

I'm shocked that Kanye West never tried to get Carrie Underwood's number after Carrie starred in a pro-Aryan ad for Almay.