Bad day jokes

I won't reply to every joke today because I want to say thanks to everyone for making funny jokes here. Every time I have a bad day (almost everyday), I always go here and read relatable jokes. It makes me happy and it's making me less anxious. I am really stressed with my school work and everything; I feel that I'm being left alone. Everyone compares me to others and all I can do is listen. I don't get enough sleep because of it... Reading these jokes entertains me and makes me laugh so hard.

I apologize for my grammar.

Today was a bad day. There was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy!

Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.

My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.

If you’re having a bad day, just punch an orphan.

Who are they going to tell? Their parents?

Today was a really bad day. My mother-in-law was hit by a cab AND I lost my job as a cab driver!

He never has a bad day because he always wakes up on both sides of the bed.

He never has a bad day because he wakes up on both sides of the bed.

So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."

Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.

Man's friend: Same.

Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.

Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.

Man: Oh great heavens!

When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:

Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?

If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.

If you're having a bad day, just slap an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their parents?

This is a bad day for me.

I always talk to my taco before I eat it.

One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!

Please read all of it. I know it's long, please read all of it.

This dad heard his daughter praying. As she was praying, she came to an end: "Goodnight grandma, goodbye grandpa, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad didn't think about the grandpa part and headed to bed. The next morning, the mom and dad heard that the grandpa died. The dad thought it was just coincidence, so he carried on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye grandma, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." After he heard "goodbye grandma," his facial expression changed, and he went straight to bed. The next morning, the grandma died out of nowhere. The dad began to worry and continued on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad got scared, so he had a plan to go to work and stay hidden there. So that's what he did. When he got home the next day, his wife asked where he had been, and he replied back, "Sorry honey, I had a horrible day today." She replied back saying: "Oh, you think you had a bad day? The mailman just died on the front porch this morning!" If you get it, you get it.

If you're having a bad day, just remember the Blobfish exists.

If you have a bad day, just think there are at least 15 people who care about you.

What time is it when you say "bad day?"

What would you call the previous president when he is having a bad day?

Donald Grump.