baby Jesus jokes
What's the difference between baby Jesus and the baby I keep in my basement?
Baby Jesus died a virgin.
How did Mary get pregnant with baby Jesus?
God fucked her.
The Sunday school teacher is a little concerned that his kids might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, “Where is Jesus today?”
Little Suzy replies, “He’s in heaven.”
Little Mary replies, “He’s in my heart.”
Little Johnny says, “He’s in the bathroom!”
The teacher says, “How do you know this?”
Then little Johnny says, “Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, “Jesus Christ are you still in there!?””
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
What's the difference between Jesus and the baby I have in my basement?
Jesus died a virgin.
What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.
When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.
