Accidental jokes

I was at my drumming lesson and I accidentally dropped my drum stick when my sister made a terrible joke.

KA-DOOM-CHA!

My brother and I were roughhousing and accidentally knocked over our bookshelf. My mom came in and started asking who knocked it over, to which I replied that I only had my shelf to blame.

Hey, can I axe you a question?

My brother likes to build "traps" to capture our cat so he can pet it. I said it wasn't gonna catch anyone, he replied with "not going to stop who?" I told him not to worry that it could capture any two.

When you go to your girlfriend's house but accidentally go into her dad's room and fuck him anyway.

Grandma: calls You: Hello Grandma, what are you doing? Why, you can't mean I'm right in the house right now? Grandma: I didn't mean to call you, bye.

Ooh, I wonder what's on this browser. *clicks* "How to tell your kid they're adopted."

I hate it when I accidentally eat out my dog, lol.

When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"

Sixty years ago, Stephen Hawking's teacher got fired for accidentally making an offensive joke. What was it? Go for your dreams, kids. Reach for the stars.

One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, "Just because you killed the butterfly, you don't get butter for a week."

They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, "Nice try."

what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?

you find the real one.

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.

I hit myself on a window yesterday. I really felt the pane.

My friend said onions only cry, so that's why I threw a coconut at him.

I accidentally bumped into a midget yesterday.

Me: "Are you ok sir?"

Midget: "Well, I'm not happy."

Me: "Well, which one are ya?"

I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?

When your uncle drops a nickel, but the only thing he really drops is his pants.

Stephen Hawking died because he accidentally lost his bluetooth connection.

It said to submit a joke, and that's what my mom did when I was born.

The reason he died is that they accidentally flipped the wrong light switch.

Louie being born.