Lostin Flowers

@lostinflowers@wje

Now defunct profile on a dying site.

Registered on 9/1/2021 · 27 followers · Last active 1 year ago

Cash

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.

Usually I just use tissues.

Line

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

What I if told you

A close-up of Morpheus from The Matrix, wearing sunglasses. The text above him reads "WHAT I IF TOLD YOU" and below him "YOU READ THE TOP LINE WRONG."

Autocorrect

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

I just heard that the inventor of the autocorrect died the other day.

May he rest in pizza.

Crush

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Me:

A young boy in a blue martial arts outfit is doing a high kick against a tree. The text on the image reads "Friend: here comes your crush, act natural. Me:"

Nun

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Nunchucks!

Two nuns are used as handles of a nunchuck. The two nuns are connected by the chain.

Short jokes

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them?

So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.

Holiday

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Bluey

The image is a three-panel meme. In the first panel, a person smiles widely with text that says "Everything is going really well and you feel great about your life's trajectory." In the second panel, the same person looks distressed with text that says "The holidays brought difficult questions from family and now you're overthinking everything." In the third panel, a scene from the cartoon "Bluey" is shown with the same person smiling again.

Noah

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

When you overslept and can't find Noah

The image shows a dinosaur standing on a paddle board in the water, with the text 'When you overslept and can't find Noah'.

Parent

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Worst punishment of all

A chalkboard with the text: “QUOTE OF THE DAY. ‘REMEMBER WHEN WE CRIED AS KIDS AND OUR PARENTS SAID ‘I’LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT’?-WE THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO SMACK US, BUT INSTEAD THEY DESTROYED THE HOUSING MARKET, QUADRUPLED COLLEGE TUITION FEES, MELTED THE ICE CAPS AND VOTED BREXIT.’ - ANON.”

Guardian Angel

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

👼😞

A statue of an angel with its hand over its face, looking disappointed. The text reads, "I have a feeling that My guardian angel sometimes looks at me like this."

Jeff Bezos

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?

He puts his PJ-Amazon!

Wrong

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

I Was Wrong!!!

The image shows two cartoon minion characters with different expressions. Above the minions, it says "I remember years ago when all I wanted to be was OLDER". Underneath, in big letters, it says "I WAS WRONG!!!".

New Year

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Happy New Year!

Michael Scott from The Office is doing the 'rock on' hand gesture with both hands. The text says: "Happy New Year!".

Keyboard

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

No one:

A keyboard with one key missing. The text on the image says "No one:" and "Literally no one:".

Christmas

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

ITS CHRISTMAS!!!

A white cat with a wide open mouth, showing its teeth and tongue. The text on the image reads: "OMG WAKE UP!! IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!" and "memegenerator.net".

Christmas Eve

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

It's Christmas Eve

The image shows a three-panel scene. In the first panel, a child says: "TONIGHT IS CHRISTMAS EVE." In the second panel, a man replies with: "YES, AND?" The third panel shows the man consoling the child while sitting on a bench. The text says: "AND TOMORROW IS CHRISTMAS."

Dog

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

I hope it's a dog

A drum kit is wrapped in green gift paper with little white dog designs. The text "I hope it's a dog" is written above the image.

Number

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Let me know what your results are!

The image shows four circles with different patterns and numbers inside. The first one is blue-ish with the number 12. It indicates kidney disease. The second one is orange with the number 15 and corresponds to lung cancer. The third one is yellow with no discernible number suggesting a brain tumor. The last one is black with the number 28, indicating heart disease.

Hall

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Deck the halls with bowels of Holly, fa la la la la, la la la la.

A Star Trek character wearing a Santa hat is pictured with the quote: "I do not know who 'Holly' is, but the desire of her enemies to deck the halls with her bowels indicates that she must be a fierce warrior, indeed."

TV

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Something I came across today.

A two-panel cartoon shows a person in 1990 and 2008. In 1990 the person is thin, standing next to a bulky CRT TV. In 2008, the person is overweight, standing next to a flat-screen TV. The text labels "1990" and "2008" are placed above the respective panels.