The best part about asian jokes are that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
What’s the difference between me and Glow In The Dark Intelligent Putty? The putty’s intelligent!
roses are red, I'm not a boaster. Elon must got rushed to hospital after impregnating toaster.
I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf...
So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.
I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.
When you reconstruct Michael Jackson and Lil Nas X to wreck havoc on preschool
Me yelling every gay slur to get suspended
I’m in catholic school
What kind of pizza did the twin towers order.Nothing it was just plane.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a suicidal vest
A suicidal vest actually works when triggered
When the emo girl is in a movie and the director says cut
There is a lot of difference between a man and woman saying,
"I went through a whole box of Tissues watching that movie"
Whats the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?
Not too sure. I just fly the drone.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Cheap oil, no immigration and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised
Dating 101
Heres what you do:
1. Dinner 2. Kiss 3. Movie 4. Sex 5. Bring her back home 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting
A Girl walks into the church and confesses..
Girl " Forgive me father for i have sinned"
Priest "How have you you sinned may i ask?"
Girl " I called a man a son of a bitch"
Priest " Why did you call a man a son of a bitch?"
Girl " He held my hand '
Priest " Like this? ( he holds the girl's hand)
Girl " Yes father"
Priest " That does not explain why you called a man a bitch"
Girl " He started taking off my clothes "
Priest " Like this? " ( He takes off the girls clothes)
Girl " yes father "
Priest " that also doesn't explain why you called the man a bitch "
Girl " Then he took off his clothes and put his you know what into my you know what "
Priest " Like this? " ( he puts his you know what into her you know what )
Girl " YES FATHER !! YES FATHER !!!
Priest " Then what? "
Girl " Then he got up and left me naked "
Priest " THAT SON OF A BITCH!! "
I'm gonna open up a bar for emos. I think I'll call it the The Cutting Board.
Some people think emo jokes are funny but I think it can cut both ways.
Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked
now it’s $3.99
Women: “Men used to go to war now they go to clubs” Men: “Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked now it’s $3.99”
What made Adam and Eve's marriage perfect?
He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about his Mom's cooking.
