Worst Jokes Ever
There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.
Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.
After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?
Fall Guys.
This is how big cats were named.
"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."
"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."
The tortoise can't go out to play, Or sell his house or rent it. For when he moves, his house moves too, And nothing can prevent it.
What is another word for Arab man who is a Palestinian Muslim?
Palestinian masseur.
I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
My girlfriend told me women are better at multitasking than men. So I told her to sit down and shut up. Guess what...
She couldn't do either!
Why can’t trans men enjoy chocolate?
It uses Hershey pronouns.
What's the difference between a hoe and a prostitute?
One is a tool. The other is your mom.
If you look for something for 10 days and a woman walks in, opens a cabinet, and finds it:
So, just hire a female pope for the Holy Grail that has been missing for 500 years so she just opens a cabinet and she finds it.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite fruit?
Boisenberry.
Trump got a new jet.
He's probably already licked the windows.
Why did Kamala Harris visit the library?
To check out some “law” books and maybe return a few skeletons.
heeeeeheeeeeeeeenjkxbzskrf
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...
Q. What's an emo's favorite type of comedy?
A. Gallows humor.
I take back my comments on the United healthcare CEO.
Being poisoned by a nurse wouldn't be that bad of a way to die as long as the nurse diluted the potassium chloride first.
What is a nudist's least favorite holiday?
Memorial Day.
Why?
Because wearing a poppy can be very painful.