Worst Jokes Ever
A girl called me ugly.
So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.
So I threw him out the window!
What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?
One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
I love all races, even the bad ones.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a Teletubby?
A. The Teletubby is a lot more coherent.
How was copper wire invented?
Two Jewish people fighting over a penny.
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was such a good pilot.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
There is a Mexican, white guy, a Jew, and a Black man on top of the Empire State Building.
First, the Mexican and the Jew throw themselves off of the building saying, "This is for my people!"
Then the Black man is next up to jump and says, "This is for my people!"
And throws the White man off of the building.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
How you guys not even know who did it? Hahahahaha.
Shia Mehdi unlived by beard guy looooool 🤨
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.