Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between Paul Walker and the Queen?
Paul Walker passed 100 before he died.
What do Nike and the KKK have in common?
They both make Black people run faster.
A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
What do you call someone who is half a Jew?
Jew-ish.
What are the three worst years of a black child's life?
First grade!
If you are what you eat,
why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?
Where can white people cook better than Black people?
On Father’s Day.
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
What's the difference between life and a rape joke?
Life fucks you until you stop breathing, a rape joke fucks you until it's not funny anymore.
What do you call four black people in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat.
What’s the difference between how you watch porn and I watch porn?
The windows we watch through.
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on green fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."
Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?
I used to believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
What do you call a blowjob in Africa?
Breakfast.
Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
Donald Trump is proudly anti-woke. He has been falling asleep in his court cases every morning!
Your move, Ron DeSantis.
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?"
Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me."
The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything."
The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too.'"
Kelly Clarkson and Ian Watkins of the Lostprophets both walk into a bar. The bartender asked, "Hitting on some 2-year-olds today?" It may have been an innocuous question, if it weren't for the fact that the bartender is Chris Hansen.