Worst Jokes Ever
The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"
The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"
The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"
The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"
The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"
Yo mama so ugly, that when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho- HOLY SHIT!"
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, grabbed her thigh, and said, "You know you wanna." Jill said yes and pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a daughter.
Haha, I fucked you over!
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.
"Can't go under it, can't go over it, we gotta go through it!"
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
Me: “You guys wanna know a cool fact?”
Friend 1: “Yeah.”
Friend 2: “Yea.”
Me: “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.”
Friend 3: “I love anime.”
Friend 1 & 2: “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Me: *Laughs at Friend 3*
The next time I knock on your door, I'll hit you instead of the door.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
Hitler only wanted peace.
A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
Why are there so many black men in the NBA that only want to play basketball on a all black basketball team? because they prefer to suck a long and thick big black dick
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
You only need 1 nail to hang a painting!
When life gives you melons, You’re probably dyslexic.
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10