What is the difference between me and a fire?
It's hot.
For those of you greener than a Mexican's card when it comes to this website, it's darker than the unemployment line.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!
A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
A Chinese couple had a black baby and named it Sum Ting Wong.
What did Mickey Mouse say to Minnie Mouse: "I don't use condoms; I use my drawbridge."
What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist.
Why can't Chinese people play football? They will eat the bat.
Why is Gennis gay?
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
Did you hear about the terrorist comedian?
He was actually quite funny...
He just blew the delivery.
(I'll show myself out).
How do you know all suicide bombers self-identify as being old?
They are all boomers in the end.
What did the terrorist do when his kidneys failed?
Dial-ISIS!
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.