Worst Jokes Ever

"Me and Explain Boat (RapBoat) are going to be married tomorrow," - Explain Bear.

I'm not into scatplay. In fact, I think that shit's disgusting.

What’s impossible?

Steven Walkings.

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite hobby?

Rolling on ice.

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite type of music?

Rock and Roll.

Q. What do a one-story house and an Alzheimer's victim have in common? A. Nothing going on upstairs.

Trump's releasing the files.

To catch all the pedophiles.

He didn't know Epstein.

Didn't touch any teens.

My sister's boyfriend was coming around for Christmas Day. He had the option of two birds to tuck into: Turkey or Goose.

I said, "Are you not satisfied with my sister, who is literally handing herself on a plate to you?!"

I tried to rape Amy Winehouse, but she said, "No! No! No!"

Inside a room full of squares, buckets, and tints, there are two inspectors. One is called Mr. Right, the other one is called Mr. Wrong. Because of their names, the first one is trusted more than the second one.

Mr. Wrong eventually got tired of that and worked on a plan for how more people could trust him. He took a jigsaw and he started to cut into his brain and sawed away half of his brain. It was still working.

Then he took a loaf of toast, cut it into half and glued it on his head, and then he made a strawberry cream and sprayed it on the toast. Because people couldn't recognize him as "Mr. Wrong," he was able to solve more cases.

What's the difference between a normal person's funeral and a person with polio?

The pose!

Say what you want about Jeffrey Epstein, but at least he knew how to take out the trash.

What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.

Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"

Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

What goes up but never comes down? Your age. You have probably heard this joke before.

An old teacher asked her student, "If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?" The student replied, "It is obviously past."

What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? -- Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.

I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.

They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.

I've had conversations with many people. Some of them were drier than my dad's ashes.

What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.