Worst Jokes Ever
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.
Your hairline is more bent than James Charles' gender.
What are Michael Jackson's pronouns?
He, he.
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.
What do you call a pregnant slave? A two for one deal.
If someone burns to death, do they get a discount at the crematorium?
Q: What does Pakistan love to do with India when they go to war?
A: Surrender their 93,000 soldiers.
How do Chinese people get their names? Their parents throw woks down the stairs and name their children after the sound it makes.
Despite my devilish attitude, I have the heart of a small boy.
I keep it in a jar on my desk.
Your mom is so fat that when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed, but the sidewalk cracked up.
What does Michael Jackson say when he stubs his toe?
Ow!
How you feel when you slit yourself once: :(
How you feel when you slit yourself more than once: <:(
How you feel when you slit yourself everyday: *dead inside*
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna." Jack undressed, and she pulled up her dress so they could have some fun. But stupid Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
Hardest part about being a paedophile?
Fitting in.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor jokes?
It can't hit home.
Today, me and my best friend went to the Grand Canyon. He was taking up all the space by the edge, and I told him to back up. R.I.P. to him.
My mom ate my food, so I ate her pet hamster.
Why is the USA bad at Clash Royale? 'Cause they already lost two towers.