Worst Jokes Ever
This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
I was digging a hole in my garden, then I found a treasure chest. I was so happy. I went to tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging a hole.
Why did the orphan become a criminal? It wants to be wanted.
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped!
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"
Dark jokes are like home. A lot of people don't get it.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
Why have there been so many deaths around the world?
Trees and ropes.
Your hairline is what caused the Great Depression.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?
His name is Vladimir Pootin.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
To be wanted.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because they have someone to call "Father."
Why do orphans love going to church?
Because they can call someone "father."
Your hairline goes so far back that even God said, "I learned about it in my days."
Cheer up! Old age doesn't last that long!
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.
She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."
Son said, "But I can't see."
Mom said, "That's the point."