Worst Jokes Ever
What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?
"What a re-leaf."
When does Friday come before Thursday?
In the dictionary.
What does cake and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter.
What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap music.
What did the boy say to his fingers? I'm counting on you.
What do kids play when they have nothing else to do?
Bored games.
My manager told me to have a good day. So I didn't go into work.
How many apples can you grow on a tree? All of them.
Did you hear about the roofer who went to the doctor? He had shingles.
I wish the grass in my yard was emo. It could just cut itself.
What is the easiest way to get into a busy hospital? Try to commit suicide.
(YES I KNOW I SPELLED SCUCIDE WRONG)
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas?
Because they're dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
I recently got pulled over by the cops and started spazzing out because of the police lights.
He arrested me for impersonating George Floyd.
*I have seizures*
Imagine playing Subway Surfers in real life.
The creator's son tried that!
(My friends said to post this. I accept no responsibility.)
I put the fun in dysfunctional.
Qualification Check:
Single
Taken
Friended ✔
What do Americans and stars have in common?
They both love shooting up.
What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?
They both like keeping one sock for themselves.
Why do men find it so difficult to solve puzzles after taking Viagra?
Because they just keep getting harder and harder!