Worst Jokes Ever
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
Why are there so many black men in the NBA that only want to play basketball on a all black basketball team? because they prefer to suck a long and thick big black dick
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
You only need 1 nail to hang a painting!
When life gives you melons, You’re probably dyslexic.
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?
Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!
Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?
Kid 2: No!
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"
My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.
Why didn't the doctor help the orphan?
Because he was a family doctor!
Your mum is so fat, when she reached for the remote, when she found it, it was crushed.
We clap when we see you. We clap our hands over our eyes.
Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
My friend and I were joking about a kid in a wheelchair, and another kid came up and said to the wheelchair kid, "You should stand up for yourself."
Orphan: Asks you random joke. What is the difference between my boomerang and my parents?
Me: The boomerang came back.
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.