The average stripper weighs 112 lbs According to the pole💈
Why are orphans so successful When they where told to go big or go home they only had one option
What brands do people in wheelchair wear?
Michelin
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
I was an orphan as a kid but I have never had a bitch so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming and she said "Mofo you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to"
The dark side of kid songs: You got a friend in me..you got a friend in me!
Kidnapper: hey kid your parents told me to pick you up Kid: Sir this is an orphanage Kidnapper: ...
me: brags about my 30 kill streak
the jury: O.o
me: *gets down on one knee*
girlfriend: omg, it's finally happening
me: *falls over*
girlfriend: the poison is kicking in
So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.
My dad starts laughing at me.
Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”
Me: “Why dad?”
Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”
My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle. So i went up a step and said "It's other Anakin I have the high ground!"
me: *stabs vampire*
wife: omg
me: *beats vampire to death*
wife: OMG
me: what
wife: ur supposed to give them candy
me: well thats a sticky situation now isnt it barbara
You know stairs right the dark my there is something I know that if you fall down the stairs your balls will be crushed
What is jefree dhamers favorite restaurant?
Five guys
Why can't orphans go on school field trips. parent signature________________
What were the balloon's last words to his Father? Watch me, Pop!
"I had raped the game young, you can call it statutory." - Kanye West in 2009 (Forever with Drake, Eminem, and Lil Wayne)
What's a opran family photo called?
Selfie.
A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said " I'm a failure at suicide too.".
friends call me crack miser, whatever I snort. My brain starts to distort! i'll be in court.
