Worst Jokes Ever
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.
I call it my trail mix.
eBay is so useless.
I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.
Wife: “How do I look?” Husband: “With your eyes.”
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus,
"Please send me a sibling!"
Santa Claus wrote him back and said, "Okay, send me your mother!"
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho... Alaska!
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
Why was the first orphan phone an iPhone X?
Because it doesn't have a home button.
Yo mama so Karen that when she went to hell, she asked Satan for the manager.
Why can't orphans have a large bag of chips? Because they're family sized.
Person: You can't kill an orphan!
Me: What are they going to do, go tell their parents?
What did Joe Biden say to the dog? I'm gonna molest you.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball, guu?
Why couldn't people have their phone on airplane mode during 9/11?
Because their phone exploded the towers.
Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they're too busy stealing all the green cards.
Why can't orphanages play baseball?
Because there's no home to go to.
What's another name for 9/11?
A forbidden game of Jenga.
Why can’t orphans get married in Alabama?
Because they don’t have a sister.
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