Worst Jokes Ever
A note for my History Teacher:
Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
Your mom is fat and so are you.
Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.
What's the difference between Jesus and a gay person?
One created the rainbow, the other one ruined it.
(Yes, I know God created the rainbow, not Jesus.)
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.
Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.
my therapist told me that time heals wounds i stabbed him now we wait
Joe mama so fat when she went to the movies, she sat next to everybody.
Joe mama so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time, please."
Joe mama so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "To be continued."
I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed, but I remembered you were adopted...
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
What do you call a bird orgy?
No bird control.
What did the Twin Towers order for dinner?
Two large planes.
What do pretzels and a corrupt government have in common?
They are both twisted.
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
I saw someone who was about to jump off a bridge. They were wearing a Nike "JUST DO IT" shirt.
Are your forehead and hairline old friends because they go way back?
Is your dad Spider-Man, because he got no way home?
I had to stop drinking because I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.
Wanna hear something twisted?
A pretzel.
"Yo mama is so fat that when I buried her, she made the Earth round."
My enemy told me I’m adopted, so I told him at least I got adopted.