Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a beehive without an exit? Un-bee-lievable!
What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barber-queue.
Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.
My wife asked me the other day where I got so much candy. I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."
Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
Which days are the strongest?
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.
My friend was showing me his tool shed and pointed to a ladder. "That's my stepladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
How do you break up a fight between two gay men?
Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
What’s one thing you can say during family dinner and in bed?
"Will there be seconds?"
What do you call a Mexican with one leg?
Border hopper.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To improve his FLOW-CULUS.
What’s one thing you can say during a family dinner and in bed?
"Where are the kids?"
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
What did the rapper name his new DOG?
Lil Bark.
Why did the dwarf work at Tesco?
Because every little bit helps!