Women jokes

I like my men like I like my coffee: black and hot.

She left, and now I support women's rights. I will kill her.

There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.

What about women's lefts?

What do women and chess have in common? When you sacrifice the females and replace them, you are more likely to win.

When a woman removes polish with chemicals, no one bats an eye.

But when Hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, everyone loses it...

I went to the “lists of women” page on Wikipedia and it was blank.

Either, Wikipedia is proving women do not exist or John Cena decided to come out as transgender.

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

I got in big trouble the other day, though it was pretty unfair. Babies kick pregnant women all the time, and yet I got arrested anyways.

Vagina jokes aren’t funny, period.

Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.

Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.

All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.

The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"

The man said, "My wife does!"

I bet you like men!

One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.

Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.

Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.

Dear doctor,

I've heard it's a good sign when women scream your first name during sex, but recently women have been screaming my full name. It's weird, I feel like I'm famous. Can you tell me what this means?

Yours Truly, Ray Palp

What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?

Something big and warm 🍆.

There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???

What's the difference between property and women? At least property still retains some value after getting wrecked.