My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high…

Where did Johnny go after he wandered into a minefield?

Everywhere

Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?

Rip Van Tinkle

Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face…

One day Billy cow wandered off to the railroad tracks where his mother always told him not to go. His mother asked him where he had gone when he got home. He replied that he was just going for a graze. His neighbor later told his mother he had saw him at the railroad tracks. What would you call Billy cow now?

Ground Beef