New Told Jokes - Page 20 - Worst Jokes Ever

My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!

I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight. One recess we met together on the playground, and she brought me to the corner of the playground. That was my first kiss, and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police, and they arrested my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson.

My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke and i burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand up comedian.

I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.

I dated an orphan and then later married him for 7 years until he told me he was an orphan.

I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.

He hugged me!

This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.

How did Helen Keller parents punish her?

They told her to go find the light.

The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰

My friend's emo. I told her to play jump rope with me. She hanged herself. Lol.

You're so ugly the densest told you to lay face down.

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?

"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.

My mom told me to be positive...

I was heading to an HIV test.

My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.

I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.