The jokes
We really should erect a statue of the guy who killed Hitler.
Joe mama so fat when she weighs herself, the weigh explodes.
Joe mama so fat, when she did the IShowSpeed dance, she fell five floors down.
Joe Mama's so fat, when she goes in the elevator, she has to go down.
Joe Mama so fat when she stepped on the sidewalk, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
He only took a day off.
Diet Day #1 - I removed all the fattening food from my house. It was delicious.
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
There's a one-story house. Everything's yellow, even the kitchen, living room, and bedrooms. What color are the stairs?
Math riddle: If I have 12 bottles of wine in one hand, and 9 in the other, what do I have?
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
I was at the bank yesterday.
A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Why couldn't the orphan go on a school trip?
A parent's signature was required.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Nuts!
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
My brother goes into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me 12 beers and a shot of whiskey." The bartender says, "That's a lot of alcohol." My brother says, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob." The bartender said, "Let me buy you a drink." My brother said, "No, this should be enough to get the taste out of my mouth."
Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.
I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.