The jokes
I took my girlfriend to the beach and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale!
Why are tomatoes red? Because they contain the carotenoid lycopene!
XD RawR woof woof bark bark UwU meowwwww ROFL LMAO LOLOLOOLOLOL KEKW KEKW PEPELASUGH
My mom telling me the brief history of the blanket and how she received it from her cousin. ( ╹▽╹ )
Me sitting anxiously in place pretending to be amazed by the story, and reacting with kind cheerfulness and a big smile. (◍•ᴗ•◍)
All I can actually think about: "I m@sturbated under it- aaaaaah" ಠ◡ಠ
Wow, didn't know little Jhony jokes were so dark. Well, but what do you expect from a site with jokes about suicide, sex, and drugs? :-)
"Drugs?????" His eyes popped out. Well, I don't really know if there actually are-- and the exact ones... But there's so many kinds of jokes-- even chin jokes. :^))
And slice jokes!
What kind of "slices"?
Handy ones. ^_^
Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?
A: "Those are two nice towers right there."
Why did the orphan become gay? Because he wanted to call someone "daddy."
When Bob the Builder looks at your hairline, he says, "We can't fix that."
It would be pretty funny if something that's not a joke was the most liked thing. It would be pretty funny, I think, lol. Just a little funny, lol.
Me and my emo group were walking down to the tree and somebody yelled, "Don't leave me!"
If her age is on the clock, she can sit on my cock.
What's the difference between an umbrella and a tree?
I don't know.
You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.
Why don’t orphans and Chinese kids play baseball. The orphans can’t find home and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing, and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dad's pants. Little Johnny says, "That explains what the lady next door was doing."
Yesterday, I was babysitting this woman's child. Everything was going perfectly.
I got hungry and called the mother. I asked if she wanted the baby back ribs I was cooking, but she said she didn't want any.
When she arrived she started screaming and ran to her child. I don't see why she was so upset, she said she didn't want any.
I keep getting these letters from this little girl every year on Father's Day. I told the orphanage to stop letting her send these.
Orphan lady: Ok kids, someone donated groceries.
Orphans: YAY!
5 minutes later...
Orphans: Wait... where's the...
Orphan lady: *tries to hold daughter*
Person who donated: *holds milk in hand* hehe
How did the man with a small penis become a rapist? His condom fell off.
I've reached the age where looking in the mirror is like checking the news. I know there'll be some new developments I won't like.
You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.