The jokes
People with Down syndrome have a specific skill only they have; they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
Vladimir Putin is probably a homophobe because he has to go through life with the name of a gay porn star.
Why do people shake cigarette boxes?
To wake up the cancer.
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
Why did the cow smell?
'Cause the horse gave it a pat on the back.
Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.
What do you call Link when he is hurt?
A link to the cast.
Why did the man walk into a bar?
Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!
What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man?
Get a fucking job.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.
Why can't Sally swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock knock, "Who's there?", not Sally.
Where did Sally go when the bombs dropped?
Everywhere.
A kid walks into the classroom on time.
What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?
Trying to fit in.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It didn't.
Yo mama so dumb when the weather said "it's chili outside," she went inside a goal, small and a bowl.
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
What is the reason for why women never look to the right?
Because they don't have any rights.
Someone burgled my house the other day. It was terrible.
They ripped all of the front and back pages of my dictionaries. Things went from bad to worse.
Imagine Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady but could not stand up.