The jokes
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
What is a suicide pack's favorite song?...
Let the bodies hit the floor.
What did the ocean say when it saw the beach?
Nothing, it just waved.
A man and a woman are watching clouds together. The man says, “Hey, that one looks like a giraffe!” The woman agrees and says, “That one looks like an elephant!” The man sits up and says, “That one looks like a mushroom.”
What did one orphan say to another?
"Robin, get in the Batmobile!"
Stephen Hawking said God isn’t real, and the Priest put a boot on his tire. 😂😂😂
So, a neutron went to a bar. He asked the bartender how much for a beer. The bartender said, "For you, no charge."
What do you call a baby in the shower? A baby in the shower.
It’s like going to the orphan and telling your mama jokes.
Two men walk into a bar. You'd think the second one would've seen it.
Did you know ghosts are alcoholics?
They only come out for the boos.
What did the bus say to the mail?
Dog.
What did one arm say to the other? "What is your address?"
Why are basements so scary? Cuz of the mail.
How do you circumcise a hillbilly? You kick his sister in the jaw.
A grasshopper walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender says, "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper looks confused and says, "Oh really? You have a drink named 'Bob'??"
What did the cow say to the other?
"Cheese!"
ble get get get gettttt pull the glock pew pew pew pew pew thats the silencer BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
Why did half of the world not see Avengers: Endgame?
Because half of them were Thanos snapped in Avengers: Infinity War.
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.