The jokes
What’s a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
What is the difference between me and a knife?
The knife has a point.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
I got an orphan an iPhone 6. I told him to press the home button. He has been doing it all day.
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
"I hate when people make 9/11 jokes because my grandfather died during the Twin Tower attacks. He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia."
What is the difference between a cow and me?
Nothing.
What can hold anything on the moon? A crater.
I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the Covid-19 patients to stay positive.
Throw a plate.
It’s broken, right?
Say “sorry” to it.
Did it fix back?
No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)
Did you know that dogs started the street craps game?
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"
Me: What do you call 4 depressed kids?
My friend: What?
Me: The Suicide Squad.
What did the chancla say to the belt?
"It's time."
What did the orphan say to his mom?
Where are you?
What's the difference between a blonde and a car door? The harder you slam the blonde, the looser it gets.
How are Tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like.
What did the brother say to the other brother? "You are brother, brother."