The jokes
A man goes for a pee in a haunted house.
He unzips his pants at the urinal when a man dressed as a goblin chuckles next to him. "You got a small dick, buddy," the man says to him.
A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."
You could hold your breath for the rest of your life.
Think about it.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To try to find his parents, but it was FREAKING USELESS!
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
What do you call a pig at the beach?
Bacon.
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad did not come back with the milk.
Why was the duck fired from the train station?
He was a bad conducktor!
Why didn't the teddy bear go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Why didn't the teddy bear want to go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Hi everyone that is mean to freshfry, Addison Banks, Drew, watersharky, Gwen, and jk master, fucking get off this site, bullies! I love everyone here except the bullies!
What did the purple grape say to the green grape? "Breathe, you idiot, breathe!"
Get it?
What is the worst thing about licking a bald fanny?
Putting the nappy on afterwards.
Why did the orphan join the baseball team?
Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.
What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?
They both try to get there before the hair does.
I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets!"