Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
SOS Jokes
Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.
Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
Yo mama so ugly, that when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho- HOLY SHIT!"
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:
"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."
Your mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, it only got rid of weight.
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car, then didn't talk to her for the rest of the day for no reason.
Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!
Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."
Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a bottle of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."
Why are there so many black men in the NBA that only want to play basketball on a all black basketball team? because they prefer to suck a long and thick big black dick
Three men die at the same time and go to Heaven. St. Peter says to them, "It's going to be a long journey to heaven, so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives."
"We'll start with you, Michael. Since you were quite the womanizer and cheated on your wife multiple times, you will be getting a Toyota." The man, embarrassed, left in the Toyota.
"Nolan, you were better; you cheated on your wife twice, so I will give you a Mercedes. Now, as for you, Mark, you never cheated on your wife; you are an absolute saint, so I will be giving you a Lamborghini."
The man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car, and he asked the man in the Lamborghini, "What the hell is going on?"
The man in the Lamborghini says, "I just saw my wife riding through the streets of Heaven on roller skates!"
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
So if you say a bear shoots children, and Leah likes Mason Boswells, and I go to Benjamin Adlard year 6.
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said, "To be continued."
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."
You're so poor that when you walked into an elevator, you thought it was a mobile home.
