What does it mean when a man sits on a boulder instead of on the ground?
A bolder choice.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? Matt.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? Bob.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, "Hello," as if the psycho will answer, "Hey, what's up? I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"
How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree?
You wave at him.
Who am I sitting next to?
When the grass is bloody, You play in the mud...
Josh: Tell me something funny.
Mark: My life.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."
wyatt is a guy who still doesn't have a girlfriend because he didnt sit with yanely and jasmine at lunch. funny joke huh
Two blondes walk into a bar. I thought one of them would have seen it.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
Fell Sans: Welp, you're BONED!
Fell Papyrus: DAMN YOU SANS!!!
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow? He got a pat on the head
A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy. "What's going on here!?" he exclaims.
The wife replies, "See, I told you he was stupid."
What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Where was Stephen Hawking during the house fire?
The top of the stairs.
My life.
I was sitting next to this really hot Thai girl on the bus, and all I could think to myself was, "Don't get an erection, don't get an erection..." But she did.
