Senior Citizen jokes

Cremation

Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?

Cremation.

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  • Door

    People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.

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  • Difference

    What's the difference between the Twin Towers and the people at the old folks home?

    They both collapsed.

    Pedophile

    My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

    It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.

    Anniversary

    I was out for dinner with my 19 year old girlfriend. I, being 42, had many people shouting at me, scolding me, calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.

    Age

    Grandma: Young people your age are married by now, why aren’t you?

    Me: Old people your age are dead right now, why aren’t you?

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