Release

Release jokes

Rape

  • They shouldn't have released the final seconds of the N722BD crash audio, it was like giving free porn to rapists.

  • 0
  • Traffic

  • There was a lot of traffic and Bob stopped.

    Babu is not a child. Helmets, helmets, flares, and light gloves — which should be his undoing today — are part of the Grünsen man's music.

    Risk: like Kuchi in Erdjeskos Age: after coax-caramel herring sauce.

    Bob Oberstein stands on the fabric of the Tapich expedition, measuring the short axis in centimeters for the short Everest. It's not funny, but the rubber star is moved 90 degrees to the right, but it happens. Tiny Fossel bans button furong. Bob Warler. Dan Grip.

    "Oh," said Bob.

    Weapons are dangerous and brutal.

    Long world!

    Here's Bob Gusko's Purselbaum starting to do it. Shaun Aram needs to take those big steps forward.

    Sing a song!

    The main series of Night Remnants is Bright Rainbows and Underworld by Stuart Haystack.

    Cars — Cars — Everything!

    The centrifugal forces losses are high. Bob's legs no longer adhere to Dam Dirk's Hilton. You can fill your stomach with three types of pilaf. At that time, the team that worked forever released the LEGO-Tele of Trep Hinab. Bob spins quickly and is yellow-blue.

    Hmm!

    The final stage: Bob's Torso Destroy action film manner over the laminate of the floor try only. Go to his leg and stop at Hastor.

    People.

    Donkey Bob tricks Commodus with his snow harp. Good science. But if the house of God says: If you are in the Bescherung District, around the house, you cannot do that.

    "The war against slaves..." Bob's comment was emotional.

  • 0
  • Epstein

  • Trump's releasing the files.

    To catch all the pedophiles.

    He didn't know Epstein.

    Didn't touch any teens.

  • 0
  • Batman

  • Batman: Arkham Knight, developed by Rocksteady Studios, is the final installment in the critically acclaimed Batman: Arkham series. Released in 2015, the game is renowned for its immersive gameplay, compelling narrative, and stunning visual design, offering players an unparalleled experience of stepping into the shoes of the iconic Dark Knight.

    The game's narrative is one of its standout features. Set one year after the events of Batman: Arkham City, the story sees Batman facing the ultimate threat against Gotham City. The Scarecrow returns to unite an impressive roster of super villains, including Penguin, Two-Face, and Harley Quinn, with a singular goal - to destroy Batman forever. The narrative is dark, intense, and filled with surprising twists, keeping players engaged till the very end.

    In terms of gameplay, Batman: Arkham Knight introduces the Batmobile as a drivable vehicle, adding a new dimension to the series' signature gameplay elements. The game's combat system is fluid and satisfying, allowing players to feel the power of Batman with every punch and kick.

  • 2
  • Rapist

  • The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals: a hacker, a rapist, a serial killer, and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial killer decides that she wants to change, but when she sees a knife she just can’t help it. She bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist gets teleported back to prison.

  • 2
  • Plane Crash

  • Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:

    Sum Ting Wong.

    Wei Toh Low.

    Ho Lee Fuk.

    Ban Din Ouch.

  • 1
  • Cancer

  • Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.

  • 1
  • Explorer

  • Three unlucky jungle explorers were captured by a band of cannibals. Whilst being tied to three respective stakes, the chieftain announces that the hapless adventurers were about to die.

    "After you're dead, you'll be skinned. The skin will be used to increase our canoe armada, and the rest of you will be food for us and our families."

    This announcement was met with gasps of despair from the bound trio.

    "There is one small favor I can offer you," the chief went on. "We'll let you choose your own method of death from what we have captured from other explorers."

    Some of the tribal members begin walking by, displaying various implements of war and death.

    The first explorer chose a crusty-looking musket. Thankfully, the powder load still fired, and he was dispatched without much fuss.

    The second chose a knife and quickly drew it across his throat.

    Both carcasses were hauled off by various tribesmen.

    The third explorer stood there resolute and deep in thought.

    After a few moments, the chieftain said, "There is no escape, you need to decide now, or I'll decide for yo..."

    "Do you have a fountain pen in any of that junk?" the explorer interrupted?

    Baffled, the chieftain sent two of his men to rummage. They came back bearing the pen and a bottle of ink.

    When the explorer noticed the ink was Noodler's Baystate Blue, his grin spread from ear to ear.

    Gathered round the explorer, spears in hand, the cannibals looked on as he was released and set to work filling the pen with ink.

    Confused, the chief began to speak, "I'm afraid we have no paper, and even if you wrote a final letter, we'd have no way of sending it anywh..."

    Cackling with triumphant glee, the explorer raised the pen into the air and began ramming it into his torso, nib first, again and again. He then fell upon the ground gasping a death rattle.

    Horrified, the chief drew close as the man beckoned him for one final word.

    "But why this painful death? When you had so many other more merciful options?" the chief asked.

    Laughing, the man gasped his last statement into the chief's ear, "You'll make no boats from me now, and your mouths will be blue for months!"

  • 2
  • Father

  • A father and his young son go to a restaurant and to keep him occupied, he gives the boy three pennies to play with. Suddenly, the boy starts choking and his face starts turning blue! The father realizes the boy has swallowed the pennies and starts slapping him on the back.

    The boy coughs up two of the pennies, but keeps choking.

    Looking at his son, panicking, the father starts shouting for help.

    A well dressed, serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a nearby table reading from her laptop and sipping a cup of coffee.

    At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.

    Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants, takes hold of the boy’s testicles and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly.

    After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last penny, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.

    Releasing the boy’s testicles, the woman walks back to her seat at the coffee bar without saying a word, but keeps the penny.

    As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, “I’ve never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?”

    “No,” the woman replied. “I’m with the Internal Revenue Service.”

  • 3
  • Helicopter

  • They finally released the audio recording from the black box in Kobe’s helicopter.

    Apparently when the helicopter caught fire, Kobe was sitting right next to the only fire extinguisher. You could hear everyone screaming for him to put out the fire, but he couldn’t figure out how to use it. They begged and pleaded for him to give the extinguisher to anyone else... the last thing you hear is Kobe saying “I’d rather die than pass it!”

  • 2
  • KGB

  • The KGB, the FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove they are the best at catching criminals. The Secretary-General of the UN decides to set them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest, and each of them has to catch it.

    The CIA people go in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that the rabbit does not exist.

    The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads, they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming.

    The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling:

    "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"

  • 1