What do you call a flat emo?
A cutting board.
What do you call a dinosaur with a butt?
A Butt-asaurus.
My friend, you lit my mind: that's what the lighter said to my thighs.
What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
It puts a whole new spin on meals on wheels. No pun intended.
"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it is too cheesy."
"YOU MORON ITS *TOO* not TO, IM GOING TO EAT YOU ALIVE AND RIP OUT YOUR PROSTATE"
What do you call a pickle sandwich?
A Big Mac!
Jokes about menstruation are never funny, period!
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
Why aren't apple chargers called apple juice? Also, how do you throw away trash cans?
Where do T. Rexes shop? Dino-stores.
What do you call two monkeys who share the same Amazon account? Prime mates.
Butter believe it.
Yesterday I was in a wind storm.
Today my ears hurt. I guess the wind was ear-itating.
Person 1: Stop making suicidal jokes!
Person 2: Okay, okay, I’ll cut it out.
Person 1: Really?
Person 2: They're not even that deep.
What kind of bee can't fly?
A KOBE.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Boo.
"Boo who?"
It's just a joke, no need to cry!
I would tell you a recycling joke.
But I’m afraid it’d just be reused over and over.
Apple tried to make a car, but it had no windows ;)
