How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
Just because she weighed as much as two women... Doesn't mean you had a threesome.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wipe his ass.
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
Why don't North Koreans like jazz music?
Because they don't have soul.
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A stego-sore-ass.
Why can't atheists solve exponential equations?
Because they don't believe in higher powers.
Why don't Amish people water ski?
Because their horses would drown.
What is the second hardest thing in the morning?
Getting up.
