Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Why do Mexicans always cross the border in twos?

Because the sign says "No Tres passing."

4

I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

3

If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, "I still love Vista, baby."

0

Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.

6

The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.

The furniture store keeps calling me back... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.

0

I was sitting next to this really hot Thai girl on the bus, and all I could think to myself was, "Don't get an erection, don't get an erection..." But she did.

6

Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant.

Jesus: "A table for 26, please." Headwaiter: "But there's only... 13 of you?" Jesus: "Yeah, we're all going to sit on the same side."

What's the difference between tuna, a piano and glue?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.

4

I walked into a room full of men masturbating. They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.

0