What's the difference between a coat hanger and an emo?
Nothing, they both hang.
What did Eminem call himself when he lost weight?
Slim Shady.
What did Jay Z say when he got pulled over?
"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one!"
What did the Queen Bee of Destiny's Child say?
"I'm so crazy in love..."
When an orphan takes a family photo, it’s called a selfie.
Why do emos get discounts at every shop? Because they have barcodes on their wrists.
Can I get a Hoyah?
I like dicks... sporting goods.
What do emos and the Twin Towers have in common? There were two, but now there are none.
What do you call an emo a cappella group?
Self harmony.
Another condom name is "Orphan's Home."
Fake emo: when I’m sad, I cut myself.
Real emo: same.
Fake emo: another piece of cake.
What do you call a blind person driving a car?
Died.
Why are bees hair always sticky? Because they use a honey comb...
Q:What do u call a security guards at Samsung A:Guardians of the Galaxy
At the age of 100, you get a letter from the Queen. At 12, you get a DM from Prince Charles.
I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"
I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.
what's yellow and cant swim? a school bus full of children
Roses are red, her name is Lily, she bends over, and said "HARDER, DADDY!"
"Abortion jokes are like the babies; they never get old."
