Nest jokes
After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.
Why did the chicken crack the safe?
To get to her nest egg.
What did the bird say to the other bird?
Nothing, because birds can't talk.
Bald Eagle.
When you see a group of pornstars sitting together looking up with their mouths open, that's when you know that Mama bird is back at the nest to feed the baby birds some worms.
What do you use to strap an eagle's nest together?
An eagle-lastic band!
Where do Eagles send their children to study?
The Alpha birds.
What do emos and a bird nest have in common?
They both hang from a tree.
What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There are twenty of them.
Closer kin, deeper in!
Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly, the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course.
The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, "I'll tell you about what you saw yesterday. You know, Dad has a big belly, and that's why Mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat." The little boy says, "But Mama, that does not make any difference." "Oh no?" the mom asks. "No," says the little boy, "When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and she blows his belly up again!"
Am I the only one who gives people in the neighborhood names they don't know they have? Like "Blue truck dude", "Loud dog guy", "Nice old lady with the rose bushes", "That slut across the street."
Nice! Angry Birds really has improved.
The Twin Towers are like Angry Birds in real life.
