Nest jokes

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.

Why did the chicken crack the safe?

To get to her nest egg.

What did the bird say to the other bird?

Nothing, because birds can't talk.

Bald Eagle.

When you see a group of pornstars sitting together looking up with their mouths open, that's when you know that Mama bird is back at the nest to feed the baby birds some worms.

What do you use to strap an eagle's nest together?

An eagle-lastic band!

Where do Eagles send their children to study?

The Alpha birds.

What do emos and a bird nest have in common?

They both hang from a tree.

What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There are twenty of them.

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? 1 baby, nailed to 10 trees.

In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...

I like turtles.

I don't like consistency. Last night, I spent three hours looking at a room and thinking, "I need a flower pot here, and the couch should be on the right." Eventually, the police arrived and led me away from my neighbor's window.

If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies?

A swallow.