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Load

5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A four-panel cartoon. The first panel shows a car driving on a bridge with a "LOAD LIMIT 10 TONS" sign. In the second panel, the father and child are in a car, the child asks "HOW DO THEY KNOW THE LOAD LIMIT ON BRIDGES, DAD?" The third panel shows the father thinking about a matrix equation and the structural load analysis of a bridge. In the fourth panel, the father, now looking dumbfounded, says: "OH. I SHOULD'VE GUESSED."

Condom

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a chart comparing the effectiveness of different birth control methods. Condoms and birth control pills are shown with 99% effectiveness. A picture of a man is next to the text "Dipping Your Cock In Flexseal" with a 100% effectiveness.

Ocean

40 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a message showing a dolphin-like head and the text: Me: "cums in the ocean." 20 years later in front of my door. Below this message is another message saying: "I would like you to stop messaging me".

Guy

65 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A cartoon rat with gold chains and a diamond pendant is at the top. Below are two green text bubbles saying "*Biggie cheese walks in*" and "What's up guys its BIGGIE CHEESE". Below this is a gray text bubble saying "Sir this is the suicide prevention hotline".

Name

7 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a question "What's your Jimmy Neutron name?" and then defines how to create one. First name is your parent's credit card number, middle name the three wacky digits on the back, and last name is the expiration date. The text is placed over an image of the show "The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius" with some characters from the show.

Card

75 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A text message exchange shows a request to buy a card because a coworker's husband was deported. The image below the message shows a greeting card that says "Adios!" with an image of a chihuahua wearing a sombrero. The second text message below the card says "what the fuck is wrong with you?"

Cheese

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Peanut

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A vintage-looking wind-up toy of a peanut with a creepy human face is pictured. The text overlay reads, "I keep screaming but god won't answer."

Tentacle

12 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a series of three tweets from Donald J. Trump's Twitter account @realDonaldTrump. The first tweet says, 'loli tentacle hentai.' The second is a reply to the first tweet and reads, 'shit this isn't google.' The third tweet, also a reply, says, 'if any of you fucks screenshot this imma nuke a 3rd world country.'

Otter

3 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a news headline that reads: "Are otter posts on social media really just a cryptic form of extremist communication?" Below the headline is text that reads: "By Ari Lurksberg Published: 8/3/2021 19:03." Under the headline is a picture of an otter holding a glass of chocolate milk. Text in the image reads: "Please accept some choccy milk from this kind otter".

Waluigi

12 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a mock-up of a Wii game cover with the text "WALUIGI GETS HIS WALUWEENIE STUCK IN A VENDING MACHINE REMASTERED" written on it. The character Waluigi is shown peeking out from the side.

Social medium

6 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows three panels. The top panel shows three aliens with the text "Do you think humans have caught up to us yet?" on the left and "I don't know, let's take a look at their social media" on the right. The middle panel is a distorted image of a frog with a red glow and the text "When it's soup time". The bottom panel shows the same three aliens, with the text "It turns out, they have surpassed us".

Virgin

64 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of two tweets. The first tweet asks whether Tarzan was a virgin before he met Jane, or if he "beat gorilla cheeks." The second tweet is a reply showing a Google search bar with the text "How to delete someone else's tweet."

Family

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a tweet from user @blockeveryacct that reads "maryland has fallen" above a screenshot of a public safety alert for Thanksgiving. The alert urges people to wear a mask, social distance, get tested and remember Maryland.

Spam

27 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Day

34 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of comments on the website Pornhub. The first comment by user Jj75312 says "1 like = 1 day without fapping" and has 4597 likes. The next comment by MmmYeah98 says "Imao" and has 1 like. The last comment by QWBXEU says "12 years bruh" and has 20 likes.

Student

122 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A tweet shows a school board proposing a list of names for a school. These names include "Drew Brees Elementary", "Bruce Lee Elementary", "John Cena Elementary School", "Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance", and "Schoolie McSchoolface". The tweet comments, "This is what happens when you let the students submit new names for their school."

Stock Market

214 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A Twitter post by Donald Trump with the text "Stock market hits another high with spirit and enthusiasm so positive. Jobs outlook looking very good! #MAGA" accompanied by a picture with two furry cartoon characters and the text "FEMBOYS RULE". This is followed by another Twitter post by Donald Trump replying to the first post "I am terribly sorry that is the wrong photo".

Toenail

6 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows three panels of a drawing. The first panel shows a hand dipping a toothpick into a container. The second panel shows a hand using the toothpick to clean under a toe nail. The third panel shows a foot with blurred motion, suggesting the person flung their foot away.

Diarrhea

15 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A young person is sitting on a bench, looking at their phone. Below the image is text that asks "IS YOUR CHILD TEXTING ABOUT their diarrhea?" followed by a list of funny definitions for common texting abbreviations. For example, "brb = bathroom bonanza", "lol = lots of liquid", and "smh = so many hemorrhoids".

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