Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

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Why should you care

life trick: don't get in relationships so nobody can break them

The image consists of two panels. The left panel shows a cartoon of a blond male character looking to the side with the text 'girls: omg i dont want to crack my neck it might break :(' and 'boys:' The right panel shows a real person holding a shovel and a tub of ice cream with the text 'Girls after breakup: *talks and shares their pain with their friends*' and 'Guys after breakup: I am going to eat this ice-cream with my tactical shovel.'

Why should you care

A split image. On the left is a screenshot from a video game with a character walking near a small structure that might be a doghouse. A creature that resembles a dog is running near the character. The text says: "Probably a doghouse, though I'm not sure since there's no dog around." On the right, there is a red die with the number 1 on top. The text reads: "ME A HALFLING: YES! I CAN REROLL. ME: ....".

Why should you care

Truly are

A set of translucent red and white dice with the title "The Cursed dice" above. The text describes the strange properties of cursed dice, including their unnatural glow, and their ability to roll specific numbers on command.

Why should you care

Almost FRIDAY

The image is a three-panel scene from a movie. In the top panel, a woman with elaborate antlers says 'You can't defeat me' with the word 'Monday' above her. The middle panel shows a man smiling and saying 'I know, but he can' with the word 'Me' above him. The bottom panel shows an explosion with the word 'Friday' on it.

Why should you care

The image is a two-panel meme. The left panel shows two hands holding the opposite ends of a sword-like object. The label 'Hug' is visible in the middle of the upper part, and 'Huge amount of money' on the bottom. The text above reads: 'What can make you feel better?' 'Me:'. The right panel has a picture of a person with a round face, with the text 'CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME OF GIVING' and 'SO I'M GIVING UP'.

Heroin Monkey

The first tweet asks "can i take pics in ur bathroom?" and shows two pictures of a woman posing in a nice bathroom. The second tweet states "I do not recommend" and shows a picture of a very dirty and run-down bathroom.

jefferyo100

The image shows the text: "me: if tanjiro can smell blood, does that mean he knows which girls are on their periods? everyone else:", followed by a cartoon face of the character Tanjiro with a surprised look.

Nintendo Fan

A woman and a man shake hands in front of a small airplane. The text on the image says: "Can a woman make you a Millionaire?" A comment below says: "Xavier: Yes! If you are a Billionaire."

Heroin Monkey

WTF
WHICH ONE CAN SAY THE N WORD

Heroin Monkey

Two tweets are shown in a side by side comparison. The first tweet reads: "To be fair, you could drive for 149 hours across Vatican City if you drive slow enough." The second tweet below the first one reads: "You can drive for 149 hours across Russia and still be in Russia". The second tweet also includes an image of the Russian map with a line of travel highlighted. It shows the route from west to east of Russia and has a text bubble displaying '149 hr'.

Cosmo the Intern

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a meme with the text "statisticians be like" at the top, followed by three graphics: a bell curve chart, a probability mass function graph with three curves, and a statistical formula. Underneath the graphics, the text continues with "yeah this may or may not happen idk."

Heroin Monkey

The image is composed of three frames. The first shows a police officer asking a driver "CAN I SEE YOUR I.D.?". The driver is replying "NO SIR. I'M shidding". The second frame shows a man looking angry with the text "AS IN DEFECATING THROUGH A SUNROOF". The last frame shows a yellow car, with three circled faces superimposed: Two of them are over the roof and the one in the bottom right is on the street. The text at the bottom says "DEFECATE".

MEME LORD

A two-panel cartoon. The top panel shows a muscular man asking a woman 'Can I buy you a drink?' She says 'Sure!'. Below the text, the text 'SHE'S NOT INTERESTED' appears. The bottom panel shows the same man asking a different, pink-haired woman the same question. The original woman is standing next to the pink-haired one and again rejects him by the text below her: 'SHE'S NOT INTERESTED'. The drawing style is cartoonish and simplified. The user name '@FATGESol' is visible in the lower left.

Heroin Monkey

The image is a comparison between a "Girlfriend" and "Uranium-235" each with a list of properties. Both are "Unstable", "Will split up on you", "Hard to find", and "Expensive". The girlfriend "Cannot be used to make atomic bomb" but the uranium can.

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a forum where the first user argues that arrays should start at one and that there can never be 0 of anything. The second user replies with the question: "Number of women you've slept with"

Heroin Monkey

The text reads, "The doctor waiting for the parents to stop crying about their dead son so he can announce the $300,000 medical bill." Below the text is a close-up of a man with a slight, almost uncomfortable, smile and a white coat.

Heroin Monkey

Sarah
Chongalongadong
when you hug a guy and you
smell his colon
11/7/14, 2:36 AM from Queens, NY
tayLORD.
ErykanBaDent
When you can still smell his colon
on your pillows even though he's
not there >>>>>>>>
@RichOrb
I love when I can smell a guy's
colon as he walks by
7/14/14, 10:13 AM
jen
basedgin
Stylish Sweetheart
KAY5wEels
after you hug a boy and you smell
like his colon <33
I smell like his colon now
11/12/14 1:16 PM

mike69

i can relate

The image is a four-panel grid showing different photos of the character Thor with text above the images. The first panel shows Thor yelling with the text "Freshman year". The second panel shows a more serious Thor with a bloody face, and the text says "Sophomore year". The third panel shows Thor with glowing eyes, and the text says "Junior year". The fourth panel shows a relaxed Thor with a long beard, sunglasses and a robe with the text "Senior year".

Heroin Monkey

Vuse
Dear person behind me,
the world is a better place
with you in it
alile
ONLY WHORES
CAN READ THIS

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