Brightness memes

Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore.

The chemist and the physicist come up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: "Assume we have a can opener..."

What's bright red and screams when you shake it? A skinned baby in a bag of salt.