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Forklift

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A dark image of a penguin with wide eyes and its beak open with the text: "YES, I CAN BE TRUSTED TO USE A 2 TON FORKLIFT. I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT RAM IT INTO ANY CO-WORKERS ON DECEMBER 16TH 2021."

Condom

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The text says: "My expired condom that has been in my wallet for years when I see a dead pig on the side of the road." The image is a dark and blurry shot through a fence.

Word

Jazzy💕 · 2 years ago

Lmao

The image shows three laughing emojis above the text "Only a genius can say these four words four times really fast." Below that, the words "EYE, YAM, STEW, PEED" are displayed in red.

Intro

I_expose_idiots · 2 years ago

A man is sprinkling something into the air. The text above him says "Just the intro." The text below him says "Keep reading ;)"

Bookmark

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A rotisserie chicken is placed on the pages of an open book. The text overlay reads: "Didn't have a bookmark. Just using a rotisserie chicken instead. Dude wth is wrong with you. You can't even close the book, how is that a bookmark? Can't knock it till you try it."

Poop

kate✨ · 2 years ago

A confused cat is looking at the camera. The text says: "My cat confused why I'm stealing his poop, putting it in a bag and taking it into another room."

Hand

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A split-panel image. The left panel shows a hand holding playing cards (an ace and a king). The text above reads, "My hands look like this." The right panel shows a hand signing a document titled "Divorce Application". The text above the document reads, "So hers can look like this."

Car

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A slightly high-angle shot captures a shelf containing assorted items. On the left, "SafeFit" and "Sesame Street" products are visible, including a glow-in-the-dark safety sign with Elmo, featuring the texts: "Drive Safely! Nothing Tickles Me More!!" Beside it, a blue "Baby's Photo Album" sits next to a promotional item labeled "especially for baby." The background fades into an indistinguishable array of colors and shapes.

Virus

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a tweet warning people not to click a link that supposedly leads to LeBron James nudes, because it's a virus that turns on caps lock.

Anatidaephobia

Anonymous · 2 years ago

The image shows a definition of "Anatidaephobia" which is "The fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you." It adds that Jimmy has anatidaephobia. Under the text is an image of a white duck which is smiling. Under the image are the words "Your ass is mine, Jimmy."

Ball

Sooploosh MacSchnibble · 2 years ago

A large, colorful beach ball, with a man standing next to it. The text below the image reads: "A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow 100 bucks. We took this ball to the beach and after close to 2 hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about 10 fun filled minutes. That was when the wind picked it up and sent it huddling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sand castles. Grown men were knocked down trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us. Eventually, we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it that it can still be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina, so there is something to be said about its durability."

Steve Harvey

Sooploosh MacSchnibble · 2 years ago

An image of a night sky with a projection of Steve Harvey's face made of light dots over Atlanta. A user comments that the lights are just stars.

Lawyer

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a three-panel comic. In the first panel, a police officer is talking to Spider-man, saying "Spider-man! There's a kid trapped on the-". The second panel shows Spider-man replying with "Fuck you". In the third panel, Spider-man is shown again next to the police officer and saying, "Remember kids, never talk to a cop without a lawyer present, for ANY reason!"

Game

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is of a fake Xbox 360 game called 'Bear' with the tagline 'The game about being a bear.' The box art shows two bears, one larger bear in the background and another in a circular frame at the bottom with the text 'Bear DLC included'. It reads 'Be a bear in over 40 bear scenarios. The ultimate bear experience!'

Meth

tabs1528 · 2 years ago

The image shows two mugshots side-by-side. The left one shows a man with short brown hair, stubble, and a serious expression, and the right shows a skinny older man with a blank expression. Below them is a cartoon of a dog wearing sunglasses and a grey t-shirt with a confused look on his face and a text bubble saying, "What is this, a crossover episode?"

Book

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A dog sits at a desk in front of a computer, holding the book 1984 by George Orwell. The text on the image says: "I got banned from twitter today. Time to quote a book I never read."

DM

Why should you care · 1 year ago

Perfect

The image shows a four-panel meme with a character from Disney's "The Emperor's New Groove" labeled "The DM" in each panel. The first panel says, "They befriended a random Kobold." The second panel says, "They're letting it do all their dirty work." The third panel says, "What if I make the Kobold really cute?" The fourth panel says, "Make it warm up to one of the more friendlier characters." Then, "Then purposely put him into harm's way so the party kills him by accident," and finally, "Oh yeah. It's all coming together."

Dog

Why should you care · 1 year ago

A split image. On the left is a screenshot from a video game with a character walking near a small structure that might be a doghouse. A creature that resembles a dog is running near the character. The text says: "Probably a doghouse, though I'm not sure since there's no dog around." On the right, there is a red die with the number 1 on top. The text reads: "ME A HALFLING: YES! I CAN REROLL. ME: ....".

Calcium

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A cute white and brown puppy with its paw up, standing on a white surface. The image text says: "salutations huzz! can I please get a peek at your calcium cannons?"

Human Right

Thoughtless · 1 year ago

A picture of Willy Wonka looking slightly off to the left. Underneath is a text that says "I'm all for human rights and shit, but if you're on a tour in a factory and decide to wander off, it should be legal for the floor workers to hunt you for sport."

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