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Absolute Memes

Masturbation

A screenshot of a Reddit post from r/Kanye, labeled NSFW. The title asks, 'Is it still ethical to jiggle my johnson to Kanye songs?' The body text below is a 'DISCUSSION' post starting with 'A while ago, I discovered that certain Kanye songs caused me to become ithyphallic...' and continues with a lengthy description of the user's masturbation habits, influenced by Kanye West's music and recent controversies. It ends by asking for an alternative suggestion like 'Jordan Terrell Carter'.

Gun

A meme featuring the 'Nobody:' format followed by a YouTube video thumbnail and title. The top text reads: 'Nobody: Absolutely no one: Not a single soul on this Earth: THEN THERE'S THE USA:'. Below this is a YouTube video thumbnail showing a man, Paul Harrell, standing outdoors in a rural area with trees behind him. The video title is 'Should You Carry a Gun While Trick-or-Treating? (2021 Halloween Special)'. The video is by Paul Harrell, has 125K views, and was uploaded 4 days ago.

Cat

A two-panel image shows a cat sitting in front of a computer with the text "When your cat messages your boss..." The second panel shows a chat with a string of random characters and the message "Absolutely. Smartest thing you've ever said."

Life

A black and white image shows a cartoon-style character with spiky hair and raised hands, overlaid with the text 'When your life is falling apart in ways you could never imagine, you start to appreciate the script.' Below the character, it reads 'ABSOLUTE CINEMA.'

Confusion

hehehe😭

A seal with big, wide eyes looking confused, with the text "When someone's explained something to you three times already but you still have absolutely no idea what's going on."

Memes

Man
ihateruss
your friend offered you to have a nice
sleep over so you guys could play lan Fortnite and
his mom you are the absolute
you decide to
worst friend anyone could ask for i hope you and
mom rot in hell, you disgust me.
his
777
Reply
H

Nonsense

The image shows a cartoonish character with a wide-open mouth, a brown muzzle and a set of orange objects inside the mouth, with the text "Packgod fans when he shouts absolute nonsense into the mic:" overlayed at the top.

Toilet Paper

A large roll of toilet paper on a stand in a bathroom next to a toilet. The text above the image reads, "Went to my buddy's house and he thought this absolute monster was gonna slip by without further inquiry."

Apology

A raccoon is looking at the camera with the text "Sorry for being annoying. It absolutely will happen again."

Nothing

A screenshot of a Discord message that reads, "Nah but why does your appendix do absolutely nothing and then just try to kill you?"

Insult

A screenshot of a text message that reads, "Listen here you toe-eyed cabbage, I wasn't born into this world so your fat ass could choke out low-level insults at me. I hope you stub your toe in the dark and have to crawl around your bedroom at 3:47am in horrific pain after going to the kitchen for a midnight snack of cheese and crackers, you absolute gormless minger."

Forklift

A dark image of a penguin with wide eyes and its beak open with the text: "YES, I CAN BE TRUSTED TO USE A 2 TON FORKLIFT. I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT RAM IT INTO ANY CO-WORKERS ON DECEMBER 16TH 2021."

Comment

Lmao another example of Amy being a petty little bitch

A screenshot of comments on a video titled "CODM Gunslinger Part 1: Ultimate Terminator". One highlighted comment from amyrulesthepizzaaa says "ABSOLUTE ASS" with fire emojis. Another comment from VancityMerc319 says, "Dang that turned out really blurry, sorry guys, dunno what happened it was fine before..." The final comment from beckwild343 says "you have a hidden talent but PLEASE keep that shit hidden" with fire and 100 emojis.

Gordon Ramsay

A meme with a pink background and an image of Gordon Ramsay's face in the top right corner. The text on the image says, "build a gordon ramsay insult". The meme has three columns under the "this is you" format to build an insult, the columns are organized by digit of birth date or like.

Man

As a man can confirm

A toy in its packaging is labeled "Useless Man". It says, "This man contributes absolutely nothing to society! Lazy. Unwashed. Just lies around all day eating chips. Now with clothing!"

Purpose

FR

A meme image with two people. The text above the image reads "THEM: OMG! HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SO LONG! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO? ME:". Below the image it says "I JUST EXIST NOW. I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PURPOSE AT ALL.". The text "@MEMESTODISCUSSINTHERAPY" is in the middle of the image.

Group

Me in group photo:

The image shows a line of forks, all standing upright except for one which is bent and lying down. The text above the image reads: "no one: absolutely no one: me in group photo:".

Monitor

For all the gamers.

The image shows four panels. The top two panels show Gandalf from "Lord of the Rings" looking in different directions with the text "Monitor 1" and "Monitor 2" respectively. The third panel shows Gandalf looking confused with the text "Where is the cursor?". The fourth panel shows two men from "Jurassic Park" in a car with the text "The cursor: Stay absolutely still. His vision is based on movement".

Patience

Me :

The image shows two panels. The upper panel is labeled "My head:" and shows a woman's face with a displeased expression. The text below her says "EXPERIENCING THE ABSOLUTE LIMIT OF PATIENCE". The lower panel is labeled "Outside of me:" and shows a happy girl with a pile of books, saying "HAHA. SURE! CLASS 7, RIGHT?"

Extraterrestrial

A possessed boi or math?

The image is a meme with two panels. The left panel shows a blue, four-limbed, cartoonish figure, described as "An extraterrestrial being, that can take on many forms, with infinite power, that can make anyone go absolutely deaf." The right panel shows a simple math equation written in a child-like scrawl: "4 x 0 = 0", labeled as "A 3rd grade math equation."

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