Justification jokes

What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"

"Officer, I drop kicked that child in self-defense." -Techno

How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?

Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"

When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.

If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.

I hate these double standards.

If you burn a body at a crematorium you're "doing a good job". If you do it at home you're "destroying evidence".

"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.

Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.

Like it if you judge people's hairlines.

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom... Until they are flashing behind you!