Justification jokes

Why do I support slavery?

Because I’m white.

"Officer, I drop kicked that child in self-defense." -Techno

If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.

The maid asked her boss, the wife, for a raise, and the wife was upset.

The wife asked, "Why do you think you deserve a pay increase?"

Maid: "There are three reasons. The first is that I iron better than you."

Wife: "Who said that?"

Maid: "Your husband."

Wife: "Oh."

Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."

Wife: "Who said that?"

Maid: "Your husband."

Wife: "Oh."

Maid: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."

Wife: "Did my husband say that as well?"

Maid: "No, the gardener did."

Wife: "So how much do you want?"

It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.

How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?

Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"

What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"

Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.

CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.

Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.

When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.