Join jokes

Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.

A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:

Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands, but all of them rejected him... except Daft Punk.

Why did everyone quit the high school volleyball team? To join Coach Kyle's team, of course!

An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"

I was going to join the debating team.

... but someone talked me out of it.