Yo mamma so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he was just asking her to get out the way.
Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat a whole species went extinct.
MVP means: “Most Valuable Player.”
In Chuck Norris' case: “Most Vaginas Penetrated”.
"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."
Chuck Norris can make Minute Maid lemonade in 5 seconds.
Your mom's so fat that One Punch Man had to take two punches.
Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.
Don't do suicide shit. Nearly killed me, tbh. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's pushing the Earth down.
Yo mama so fat she broke the stairway to heaven...
Your mom is so fat that when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Tried committing suicide last night...
Never doing that shit again, I almost killed myself!
Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!
When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.
Chuck Norris is so immortal, even he killed Death.
Yo mama so fat that she broke the scale when she put one foot on it.
Yo mama so ugly a rapist wouldn't even touch her with a barge pole.
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
The reason why I stopped eating salads was not to be unhealthy; it was so I don't need to eat the wheelchairs along with all those fucking vegetables.
