Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me.
How do you throw a space party?
You planet 🤣🤣🤣
There are 6 kinds of vitamins. Wanna know how the 6th vitamin was made? Just ask the Ku Klux Klan, they will tell you.
why do orphans have phones? because they don't know how to call home
How many babies does it take to paint a wall, depneds on how hard you throw them
Ooh, I wonder what's on this browser. *clicks* "How to tell your kid they're adopted."
After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, “Ma’am, I’ve got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?” After quickly thinking it over, she responds, “I’ll have the bad news first doctor”.
The doctor replies, “Well, I’m not sure how to put this, and I’m sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair”.
Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. “Doctor, if that’s the bad news, what’s the good news”. The doctor replies, “He’s dead”.
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
102, if you have some alive ones.
How do make an adult cry?
Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, either. It depends on how hard you throw them.
How do you get ten babies in a bowl?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Doritos.
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
Me: I finished a book with 100 pages.
Someone else: How was it?
Me: It's a long story.
How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
How are guys and tile floors alike?
If you lay them right the first time you can walk all over them for years.
How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
One, if you throw it hard enough.
